Archive for February, 2010

EMOTIONAL EATING Part 3: Soothing the Soul, Not Making Waves, and Other Uses of Overeating

Thursday, February 25th, 2010

While it may be hard to stop, it’s usually not so hard to see “stress eating” in operation.  A lot of emotional eating, though, hides in plain sight.  You might not always see the connection between what you’re feeling and how you’re eating.  

If you’re asking the question, “Why can’t I get myself to eat the way I want to?” , you can suspect emotional eating (though even this gets complicated these days, with foods “engineered” to make us want more).  It starts so very easily:  eating is one of our most fundamental human activities.  We can’t live without it.  We’re wired to like it very much, and to seek it out.  We associate it with being cared for and comfortable.  It doesn’t take much for food to start easing problems other than hunger.   

Food is especially good at soothing and distracting us.  It may distract us from bad feelings or critical thoughts about ourselves.  It serves well, too, to quiet disturbing emotions that might feel dangerous to approach—doubts about a relationship, for instance, or anger at someone we love.   Overeating can keep these kinds of feelings from surfacing—and save us from having to speak up or confront daunting situations.  Also, overeating, and then worrying about it, can replace other kinds of worries, ones that might prove way more upsetting.  Conversely, through overeating we can beat ourselves up when we feel guilty, mad at ourselves, or undeserving of good things.  (more…)

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EMOTIONAL EATING Part 2: Eating as Stress Management

Thursday, February 18th, 2010

Emotional eating takes many forms, some easier to recognize than others, most pretty common.  One form that many admit to is “stress eating”.  Maybe you’ve had a bad day and think “I deserve it” as you head for the Haagen Daz.  Maybe you think “I just can’t bother right now” with choosing something better—you’re just too strung out.    Or maybe there’s a certain kind of situation, like a deadline or an argument, that always starts you grazing.

In some ways, food serves the stress management function well.  It’s fast.  And the chewing or crunching, the melting sweet in the mouth, the feeling of taking exactly what you want—any or all of these things can be very pleasing indeed.  Eating distracts you for a little while, too.  And if you eat enough, you may even get a sleepy or slowed-down feeling that cuts anxiety.

Eating as stress management doesn’t work, though, in anything more than a temporary way.  Sometimes the relief lasts only as long as the chewing, in fact.  And even if you do get relief for longer—20 minutes?  60?—the real trouble comes after days and weeks.  It doesn’t take long at all for stress eating to equal pounds.  And that creates brand-new stresses to deal with, like worsened self-esteem, and at some point high blood pressure and diabetes risk.  (more…)

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EMOTIONAL EATING Part 1: Breaking the Rules

Thursday, February 11th, 2010

We love those weight loss tips and smart food rules.  But what if you can’t stick to them?  That’s the question that brings many to diet coaches, and to this website, too.  So before dwelling more on those rules, I’m going to veer off for a four-part look at emotional eating.

Maybe you  know this scenario by heart:  You’ve been doing great.  You feel good about how you’ve been eating. You’ve lost some weight.   It seems like it’s really happening this time.  Then one day it’s just not anymore.  You don’t feel like it.  The brownies at work pull like a magnet.  The convenience store calls to you all the way home.   You’re back at the counter picking at seconds.  And whatever your particular episode involves, it starts the unravelling.

Or, maybe you’re one whose more likely to start out with good intentions each day, only to find yourself snacking all night long—in your case the good stretch never really got started in the first place. (more…)

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